2 Days 2 Dreary

{
    "type": "entry",
    "author": {
        "name": "Jared White",
        "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/",
        "photo": null
    },
    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/20241229/2-days-left-of-2024",
    "published": "2024-12-29T21:09:33-08:00",
    "content": {
        "html": "<p>As I write this, we\u2019re just two days, two hours, and change away from <strong>January 1, 2025</strong>. \ud83e\udee8</p>\n\n<p>I think a lot of people have a complicated relationship with the passing of time in this manner. While it can be comforting to feel a sense of closure, the end of a chapter in a person\u2019s life and the fresh beginning of a new one, there is also serious trepidation over the future. And given the <em>unprecedented lolololz</em> events of the last few years, there\u2019s no doubt that a great many of us are fighting off despair and depression as we contemplate how this next year might unfold.</p>\n\n<p><strong>I\u2019d be lying if I said I personally am \u201cexcited\u201d about 2025.</strong> That\u2019s just not a word I can trot out in all good conscience. But one thing I <em>can</em> tell you is I feel as grounded in the core of my being as I ever have, and I\u2019m as committed to the values I hold dear as I ever have been. I know what I stand for, I know what I\u2019ll fight for, and I know who is with me. <strong>I\u2019m not in the least bit conflicted.</strong></p>\n\n<p>And that, truth be told, is a pretty fucking great feeling.</p>\n\n<p>Happy New Year &amp; <em>\u00a1Viva la Revoluc\u00edon!</em></p>",
        "text": "As I write this, we\u2019re just two days, two hours, and change away from January 1, 2025. \ud83e\udee8\n\nI think a lot of people have a complicated relationship with the passing of time in this manner. While it can be comforting to feel a sense of closure, the end of a chapter in a person\u2019s life and the fresh beginning of a new one, there is also serious trepidation over the future. And given the unprecedented lolololz events of the last few years, there\u2019s no doubt that a great many of us are fighting off despair and depression as we contemplate how this next year might unfold.\n\nI\u2019d be lying if I said I personally am \u201cexcited\u201d about 2025. That\u2019s just not a word I can trot out in all good conscience. But one thing I can tell you is I feel as grounded in the core of my being as I ever have, and I\u2019m as committed to the values I hold dear as I ever have been. I know what I stand for, I know what I\u2019ll fight for, and I know who is with me. I\u2019m not in the least bit conflicted.\n\nAnd that, truth be told, is a pretty fucking great feeling.\n\nHappy New Year & \u00a1Viva la Revoluc\u00edon!"
    },
    "name": "2 Days 2 Dreary",
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43379584",
    "_source": "2783"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-29 21:58-0800",
    "url": "https://gregorlove.com/2024/12/reading-the-obelisk-gate/",
    "syndication": [
        "https://www.goodreads.com/read_statuses/8815748212"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Currently reading: The Obelisk Gate by N.K. Jemisin (ISBN 9780316229265)",
        "html": "<p>Currently reading: <span class=\"p-read-of h-cite\"><a class=\"u-url\" href=\"https://gregorlove.com/isbn/9780316229265\">The Obelisk Gate</a> by <span class=\"p-author\">N.K. Jemisin</span> (ISBN <span class=\"p-uid\">9780316229265</span>)</span></p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "gRegor Morrill",
        "url": "https://gregorlove.com/",
        "photo": "https://gregorlove.com/site/assets/files/6268/profile-2021-square.300x0.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "43379429",
    "_source": "95"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-29 20:42-0800",
    "url": "https://gregorlove.com/2024/12/finished-the-free-peoples-village/",
    "syndication": [
        "https://www.goodreads.com/read_statuses/8815351817"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Finished reading: The Free People\u2019s Village by Sim Kern (ISBN 9781646143306)",
        "html": "<p>Finished reading: <span class=\"p-read-of h-cite\"><a class=\"u-url\" href=\"https://gregorlove.com/isbn/9781646143306\">The Free People\u2019s Village</a> by <span class=\"p-author\">Sim Kern</span> (ISBN <span class=\"p-uid\">9781646143306</span>)</span></p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "gRegor Morrill",
        "url": "https://gregorlove.com/",
        "photo": "https://gregorlove.com/site/assets/files/6268/profile-2021-square.300x0.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "43379430",
    "_source": "95"
}

More cat woes

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-30T00:13:59-08:00",
    "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/blog/15146-More-cat-woes",
    "category": [
        "cats",
        "Tyler"
    ],
    "name": "More cat woes",
    "content": {
        "text": "When I adopted Tyler, his tail had a couple of kinks in it, apparent signs of dislocations or other injuries. The vet said that they\u2019re just a normal thing that happens to some cats, and that it\u2019s generally not harmful to them and there isn\u2019t really anything that can be done.\n\nUnfortunately, Tyler how has a third kink in his tail, and this one\u2019s pretty close to his spine, and he\u2019s clearly in pain from it. He\u2019s been unable to clean his hindquarters anymore (which he was never great at to begin with) and whenever I try brushing him or even gently petting him there he\u2019s clearly in a lot of distress. Even just lying in place he\u2019s having a lot of trouble getting comfortable.\n\nSo, I\u2019m going to take him to the vet, and I expect that whatever they find it\u2019s going to be pretty expensive to take care of. Sigh.\n\nFrom what I\u2019m finding online, most likely the vet will want to do some x-rays, and depending on what they find they might either need to set the joints and splint his tail for a while or, unfortunately, they may need to amputate.\n\nBut he\u2019s clearly in a lot of pain and I want him not to be!",
        "html": "<p>When I adopted Tyler, his tail had a couple of kinks in it, apparent signs of dislocations or other injuries. The vet said that they\u2019re just a normal thing that happens to some cats, and that it\u2019s generally not harmful to them and there isn\u2019t really anything that can be done.</p><p>Unfortunately, Tyler how has a third kink in his tail, and this one\u2019s pretty close to his spine, and he\u2019s clearly in pain from it. He\u2019s been unable to clean his hindquarters anymore (which he was never great at to begin with) and whenever I try brushing him or even gently petting him there he\u2019s <em>clearly</em> in a lot of distress. Even just lying in place he\u2019s having a lot of trouble getting comfortable.</p><p>So, I\u2019m going to take him to the vet, and I expect that whatever they find it\u2019s going to be pretty expensive to take care of. Sigh.</p><p>From what I\u2019m finding online, most likely the vet will want to do some x-rays, and depending on what they find they might either need to set the joints and splint his tail for a while or, unfortunately, they may need to amputate.</p><p>But he\u2019s clearly in a lot of pain and I want him not to be!</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "fluffy",
        "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/",
        "photo": "https://beesbuzz.biz/static/headshot.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43379069",
    "_source": "2778"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "author": {
        "name": "Jared White",
        "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/",
        "photo": null
    },
    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/20241228/pleasant-end-to-an-unpleasant-year",
    "published": "2024-12-28T18:04:20-08:00",
    "content": {
        "html": "<p>My brother is in town, because hey-o, my life completed another revolution around the sun recently. (Yup, I\u2019m a December baby.) So me and kids and their uncle have all been gallivanting around <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/tag/portland\">#Portland</a> today, and the city feels cute and cozy. I must say it\u2019s a <strong>very pleasant end</strong> to what has been a very unpleasant year in many respects.</p>\n\n<p>I\u2019ll be coming out with my \u201chopes for 2025\u201d spiel soon, but for now, I\u2019m sincerely grateful to be surrounded by family and appreciating the place where I live.</p>",
        "text": "My brother is in town, because hey-o, my life completed another revolution around the sun recently. (Yup, I\u2019m a December baby.) So me and kids and their uncle have all been gallivanting around #Portland today, and the city feels cute and cozy. I must say it\u2019s a very pleasant end to what has been a very unpleasant year in many respects.\n\nI\u2019ll be coming out with my \u201chopes for 2025\u201d spiel soon, but for now, I\u2019m sincerely grateful to be surrounded by family and appreciating the place where I live."
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "43369111",
    "_source": "2783"
}

Too many projects, not enough time or energy

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-27T22:00:11-08:00",
    "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/blog/5625-Too-many-projects-not-enough-time-or-energy",
    "category": [
        "programming",
        "burnout",
        "projects",
        "organization",
        "todo"
    ],
    "name": "Too many projects, not enough time or energy",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "fluffy",
        "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/",
        "photo": "https://beesbuzz.biz/static/headshot.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43361018",
    "_source": "2778"
}

Link: Sony Pictures CEO Tony Vinciquerra on Madame Web & Kraven the Hunter: “They're not terrible films”

{
    "type": "entry",
    "author": {
        "name": "Jared White",
        "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/",
        "photo": null
    },
    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/links/20241227/madame-web-was-good-huh",
    "published": "2024-12-27T19:50:23-08:00",
    "content": {
        "html": "<blockquote>\n  <h2><a href=\"https://deadline.com/2024/12/sony-pictures-ceo-why-madame-web-flopped-box-office-spider-man-spinoffs-avoid-getting-destroyed-critics-1236242529/\"></a></h2>\n\n  <p>\u201cMadame Web underperformed in the theaters because the press just crucified it. It was not a bad film, and it did great on Netflix,\u201d Vinciquerra told the Los Angeles Times. He also acknowledged that Kraven the Hunter underperformed like Madame Web and suggested, \u201cfor some reason, the press decided that they didn\u2019t want us making these films \u2026 and the critics just destroyed them.\u201d</p>\n\n</blockquote>\n\n<p><em>Oookaayyy\u2026\u2026</em></p>\n\n<p>In the interests of full transparency, because why should you trust what I have to say if I\u2019m unwilling to admit when I have been spectacularly wrong\u2014<a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/20241213/kraven-the-hunter\">I wrote back on December 13</a>:</p>\n\n<blockquote>\n  <p>I have a feeling [Kraven the Hunter] is going to be a slow but steady burn at the box office, and we\u2019ll be surprised at the numbers when all is said and done.</p>\n</blockquote>\n\n<p>Oh boy was I wrong! Kraven was a <em>miserable failure</em> at the box office, so much so that the previous duds look like decent examples by comparison. If there was any surprise, it\u2019s that the numbers weren\u2019t just dismal, <strong>they were pathetic</strong>.</p>\n\n<p>But as you can see by the quote up top, the CEO of Sony Pictures seems to be in complete denial about this fact, and prefers to gaslight us by saying it\u2019s not his fault his <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/tag/movies\">#movies</a> did poorly, it\u2019s the fault of critics!</p>\n\n<p>I won\u2019t even dignify that with a response, but if you\u2019re in the mood for an <em>epic</em> rant on this score, check out <a href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgSKUS9_mXU\">John Campea\u2019s take on Vinciquerra\u2019s comments</a>. Lots of shouting and swearing involved, but it\u2019s very entertaining!</p>",
        "text": "\u201cMadame Web underperformed in the theaters because the press just crucified it. It was not a bad film, and it did great on Netflix,\u201d Vinciquerra told the Los Angeles Times. He also acknowledged that Kraven the Hunter underperformed like Madame Web and suggested, \u201cfor some reason, the press decided that they didn\u2019t want us making these films \u2026 and the critics just destroyed them.\u201d\n\n\n\nOookaayyy\u2026\u2026\n\nIn the interests of full transparency, because why should you trust what I have to say if I\u2019m unwilling to admit when I have been spectacularly wrong\u2014I wrote back on December 13:\n\n\n  I have a feeling [Kraven the Hunter] is going to be a slow but steady burn at the box office, and we\u2019ll be surprised at the numbers when all is said and done.\n\n\nOh boy was I wrong! Kraven was a miserable failure at the box office, so much so that the previous duds look like decent examples by comparison. If there was any surprise, it\u2019s that the numbers weren\u2019t just dismal, they were pathetic.\n\nBut as you can see by the quote up top, the CEO of Sony Pictures seems to be in complete denial about this fact, and prefers to gaslight us by saying it\u2019s not his fault his #movies did poorly, it\u2019s the fault of critics!\n\nI won\u2019t even dignify that with a response, but if you\u2019re in the mood for an epic rant on this score, check out John Campea\u2019s take on Vinciquerra\u2019s comments. Lots of shouting and swearing involved, but it\u2019s very entertaining!"
    },
    "name": "Link: Sony Pictures CEO Tony Vinciquerra on Madame Web & Kraven the Hunter: \u201cThey're not terrible films\u201d",
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43360478",
    "_source": "2783"
}

Some thoughts on comments

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-27T12:34:00-08:00",
    "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/blog/7457-Some-thoughts-on-comments",
    "category": [
        "meta",
        "Internet",
        "comments"
    ],
    "name": "Some thoughts on comments",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "fluffy",
        "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/",
        "photo": "https://beesbuzz.biz/static/headshot.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43357983",
    "_source": "2778"
}

How to Be a Real (Good) Man…Epic Fail!

{
    "type": "entry",
    "author": {
        "name": "Jared White",
        "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/",
        "photo": null
    },
    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/articles/how-to-be-a-real-man",
    "published": "2024-12-26T10:38:20-08:00",
    "content": {
        "html": "<img alt=\"\" src=\"https://res.cloudinary.com/mariposta/image/upload/w_1200,c_limit,q_65/man-not-enough.jpg\" /><h2>Here\u2019s the honest truth: I have been failed by every single male role model in my life.</h2>\n\n<p>A few months ago, as I was searching for some new reading material on \u201ctonic masculinity\u201d as opposed to the toxic variety, I came across the book <em>Man Enough</em> by Justin Baldoni.</p>\n\n<p>Now I knew absolutely nothing about Baldoni. I\u2019d never listened to his podcast, watched his TED talk, or seen any of his movie or TV appearances. (I was so out of the loop, I hadn\u2019t even connected the dots between him and <em>It Ends with Us</em>\u2026a film I might add I still haven\u2019t seen.) But the description sounded interesting, and he seemed like the artsy hipster type. Right up my alley. So I bought the book from my local bookstore (<a href=\"https://www.powells.com/\">Powell\u2019s</a>, of course) and went into it with a completely open mind.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Oh I made a big mistake!</strong></p>\n\n<p>First off, pretty soon after getting started on the Preface and the Introduction and then Chapter 1, I found myself rather put off by the bland writing. More than bland\u2014I just don\u2019t think this book is well-written. Maybe it gets better later on? I must admit, I fizzled out before I could find out.</p>\n\n<p>I also didn\u2019t find myself relating much to stories which\u2014while I don\u2019t doubt happened\u2014sound utterly clich\u00e9. Like being taunted by bullies to jump off a bridge into freezing cold water when he was thirteen, and if he didn\u2019t he\u2019s a \u201cpussy\u201d. Isn\u2019t this every melodramatic coming-of-age boy story ever?</p>\n\n<p>It\u2019s a bummer he didn\u2019t tell them to go pound sand and skedaddle on out of there. But maybe I need to read the rest of the book to learn what that was all about. Also it\u2019s probably on me that, since I was homeschooled my entire childhood until graduating from high school (jazz hands on that last bit), I never dealt with idiot teenagers on cold bridges. I <em>did</em> deal with idiot teenagers online, because I was <em>very online</em> pretty much from the moment you could be. But that\u2019s a different tale.</p>\n\n<h3>And Then, The Controversy</h3>\n\n<p>With me feeling bored and disappointed that yet another attempt to \u201cgrapple with my manhood\u201d had landed with a thud, I moved onto to other more immediate matters.</p>\n\n<p><em>Wham!</em> December 20, 2024: <a href=\"https://www.today.com/popculture/movies/blake-lively-complaint-justin-baldoni-it-ends-with-us-rcna185107\">Blake Lively has filed a sexual harassment complaint against Justin Baldoni</a>.</p>\n\n<p><strong>What. The. Actual. Fuck.</strong></p>\n\n<p>Since that bombshell, there\u2019s been a frenzy of activity. Baldoni got dropped by his talent agency, awards have been rescinded (because I guess Baldoni isn\u2019t a feminist after all), and now he\u2019s being sued <em>by his own former publicist</em>.</p>\n\n<p>The author of the book <em>It Ends with Us</em>, Colleen Hoover, is publicly standing by Blake Lively, and other cast members are as well. And if you read Lively\u2019s complaint, part of the shocking allegations are that Justin Baldoni wasn\u2019t just acting like a creep on set, but he then attempted to get his PR folks to launch a smear campaign to discredit Lively and \u201cruin her reputation before the film was released\u201d.</p>\n\n<p>Gee, sounds like a swell guy.</p>\n\n<p>Now of course everyone is innocent until proven guilty, and until this gets adjudicated in a court of law, all we have are bits and pieces of evidence (such as text messages) and people\u2019s perspectives on what happened during those events. But that won\u2019t stop most people from \u201ctaking sides\u201d\u2014you could say this is the new \u201cJohnny Depp vs. Amber Heard\u201d. Hollywood is no stranger to salacious scandals!</p>\n\n<p>But now back to me.</p>\n\n<h3>This is Why We Can\u2019t Have Nice Things</h3>\n\n<p>I don\u2019t find it coincidental in the slightest that the <em>one</em> book I bought since I was in the throes of 2000s-era patriarchal evangelicalism that was <em>specifically</em> about \u201cmanhood\u201d just so happens to be authored by a dude who is now engulfed in controversy and being canceled.</p>\n\n<p>Because here\u2019s the honest truth:</p>\n\n<p><strong>I have been failed by every single male role model in my life.</strong>*</p>\n\n<p>* (I <em>am</em> on good terms with my father these days, but only after many years of hard work getting past painful differences and, at times, estrangement.)</p>\n\n<p>Pastors have let me down. Almost every single one I ever followed back in my religious days ended up falling from grace and was found guilty of all sorts of heinous sins.</p>\n\n<p>Local business leaders have let me down.</p>\n\n<p>Politicians have let me down.</p>\n\n<p>Programmers have let me down. (<a href=\"https://www.bridgetownrb.com/future/road-to-bridgetown-2.0-escaping-burnout/\">why? WHY??</a>)</p>\n\n<p>Virtually every CEO of every major tech company has let me down spectacularly. (And to think I once admired Satya Nadella. How na\u00efve I was!)</p>\n\n<p>It\u2019s not a question of who in particular has ended up on the <em>Epic Fail!</em> list. <strong>It\u2019s who hasn\u2019t.</strong> And I would have to think long and hard about that list because, wow, it\u2019s tiny.</p>\n\n<p>Now it\u2019s certainly true I\u2019ve had many friends over the years both online and offline of various gender expressions who I deeply respect and appreciate. But the trick is, none of these people are in <strong>positions of power</strong> as you and I would understand it. I still don\u2019t fully grasp the reasons why, but <strong>it really does seem that men (white men at least!) are almost universally unable to handle the slightest whiff of unaccountable authority</strong>. And the sad truth is, those scenarios are the norm, not the outlier.</p>\n\n<p>\ud83d\udea8 <strong>Mediocre white men.</strong> \ud83d\udea8</p>\n\n<p>Spare us, please.</p>\n\n<p>I realize, as a white man, I have to put in significant work to recognize when I\u2019m being insensitive, when I\u2019m taking up all the \u201cspace\u201d in a dialogue without realizing it, when I\u2019m expecting people to simply believe my expertise without proving it first. It\u2019s been a process over the years to \u201ccheck my privilege\u201d and I know I\u2019ll keep screwing up from time to time.</p>\n\n<p>What truly, utterly enrages me is when the \u201cmanosphere\u201d just comes right out and says <em>Naw, we like our privilege. Fuck you all!</em> It\u2019s the coward\u2019s way out, and the way they think they\u2019re being \u201cmanly\u201d when they act like total assholes makes my stomach churn.</p>\n\n<p>But equally upsetting is when the performative \u201cgood guys\u201d\u2014the Justin Baldoni\u2019s of the world\u2014get exposed. Alas, this isn\u2019t my first rodeo on that front. I was a <em>huge</em> fan of very Jewish shock comedian Jamie Kilstein a number of years back\u2014he\u2019d already been through a cancellation during a stint as a loud-and-proud liberal, but he\u2019d bounced back to some degree and was trying to portray himself as an open-minded political moderate. (Nowadays I would instantly see that as a red flag, but back then I admired it.) But surprise, surprise\u2014all of a sudden he ended up cozying up to Tim Pool (!!), started hanging out with other alt-right types, and now he\u2019s married and openly a \u201cChristian\u201d (sorry, I don\u2019t buy it for a minute). And <a href=\"https://drdrew.com/\">this is who he recently interviewed</a>\u2014definitely moderate huh. \ud83d\ude44</p>\n\n<p>So yeah. Guys getting red-pilled, \u201cfeminists\u201d getting exposed, religious manly men going off the deep end, CEOs becoming drunk with absolute power\u2026it is <em>bleak</em> out there. And <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/20241211/post-toxic-masculinity\">as I already wrote about</a>, while I appreciated the \u201ctonic masculinity\u201d of Tim Walz which made a big national splash for a hot minute there, I also didn\u2019t find a whole lot to relate to personally. (I\u2019m not going to restore my prized jalopy any time soon. I guess I must be a communist because I hate cars!)</p>\n\n<h3>Where to Go from Here\u2026</h3>\n\n<p>I\u2019m afraid I don\u2019t have many answers right now. I feel like the \u201cbrand\u201d of \u201cbeing a man\u201d has never been more in the toilet\u2014at least here in America. And with the incoming Trump 2.0 administration which is absolutely bone-chilling in too many ways to count, the future of manhood at the national level is dark indeed.</p>\n\n<p>All I can say is this: <strong>I\u2019ll keep speaking out on this topic</strong>. I\u2019ll keep writing about masculinity on my blog. I\u2019ll keep thinking about my own gender expression and how that\u2019s evolving. I can tell you right now, 2025 will be a year of experimentation for me. I\u2019m going to slingshot <em>gender conformance</em> right into the heart of the sun. Because if \u201cbeing a man\u201d means being like all of these people who have shown themselves to be truly awful humans, then <strong>fuck being a man</strong>.</p>\n\n<p>I\u2019ll be something else.</p>\n\n\n\n  <br /><p>\n    \n      <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/tag/gender\">#gender</a>\n    \n  </p>",
        "text": "Here\u2019s the honest truth: I have been failed by every single male role model in my life.\n\nA few months ago, as I was searching for some new reading material on \u201ctonic masculinity\u201d as opposed to the toxic variety, I came across the book Man Enough by Justin Baldoni.\n\nNow I knew absolutely nothing about Baldoni. I\u2019d never listened to his podcast, watched his TED talk, or seen any of his movie or TV appearances. (I was so out of the loop, I hadn\u2019t even connected the dots between him and It Ends with Us\u2026a film I might add I still haven\u2019t seen.) But the description sounded interesting, and he seemed like the artsy hipster type. Right up my alley. So I bought the book from my local bookstore (Powell\u2019s, of course) and went into it with a completely open mind.\n\nOh I made a big mistake!\n\nFirst off, pretty soon after getting started on the Preface and the Introduction and then Chapter 1, I found myself rather put off by the bland writing. More than bland\u2014I just don\u2019t think this book is well-written. Maybe it gets better later on? I must admit, I fizzled out before I could find out.\n\nI also didn\u2019t find myself relating much to stories which\u2014while I don\u2019t doubt happened\u2014sound utterly clich\u00e9. Like being taunted by bullies to jump off a bridge into freezing cold water when he was thirteen, and if he didn\u2019t he\u2019s a \u201cpussy\u201d. Isn\u2019t this every melodramatic coming-of-age boy story ever?\n\nIt\u2019s a bummer he didn\u2019t tell them to go pound sand and skedaddle on out of there. But maybe I need to read the rest of the book to learn what that was all about. Also it\u2019s probably on me that, since I was homeschooled my entire childhood until graduating from high school (jazz hands on that last bit), I never dealt with idiot teenagers on cold bridges. I did deal with idiot teenagers online, because I was very online pretty much from the moment you could be. But that\u2019s a different tale.\n\nAnd Then, The Controversy\n\nWith me feeling bored and disappointed that yet another attempt to \u201cgrapple with my manhood\u201d had landed with a thud, I moved onto to other more immediate matters.\n\nWham! December 20, 2024: Blake Lively has filed a sexual harassment complaint against Justin Baldoni.\n\nWhat. The. Actual. Fuck.\n\nSince that bombshell, there\u2019s been a frenzy of activity. Baldoni got dropped by his talent agency, awards have been rescinded (because I guess Baldoni isn\u2019t a feminist after all), and now he\u2019s being sued by his own former publicist.\n\nThe author of the book It Ends with Us, Colleen Hoover, is publicly standing by Blake Lively, and other cast members are as well. And if you read Lively\u2019s complaint, part of the shocking allegations are that Justin Baldoni wasn\u2019t just acting like a creep on set, but he then attempted to get his PR folks to launch a smear campaign to discredit Lively and \u201cruin her reputation before the film was released\u201d.\n\nGee, sounds like a swell guy.\n\nNow of course everyone is innocent until proven guilty, and until this gets adjudicated in a court of law, all we have are bits and pieces of evidence (such as text messages) and people\u2019s perspectives on what happened during those events. But that won\u2019t stop most people from \u201ctaking sides\u201d\u2014you could say this is the new \u201cJohnny Depp vs. Amber Heard\u201d. Hollywood is no stranger to salacious scandals!\n\nBut now back to me.\n\nThis is Why We Can\u2019t Have Nice Things\n\nI don\u2019t find it coincidental in the slightest that the one book I bought since I was in the throes of 2000s-era patriarchal evangelicalism that was specifically about \u201cmanhood\u201d just so happens to be authored by a dude who is now engulfed in controversy and being canceled.\n\nBecause here\u2019s the honest truth:\n\nI have been failed by every single male role model in my life.*\n\n* (I am on good terms with my father these days, but only after many years of hard work getting past painful differences and, at times, estrangement.)\n\nPastors have let me down. Almost every single one I ever followed back in my religious days ended up falling from grace and was found guilty of all sorts of heinous sins.\n\nLocal business leaders have let me down.\n\nPoliticians have let me down.\n\nProgrammers have let me down. (why? WHY??)\n\nVirtually every CEO of every major tech company has let me down spectacularly. (And to think I once admired Satya Nadella. How na\u00efve I was!)\n\nIt\u2019s not a question of who in particular has ended up on the Epic Fail! list. It\u2019s who hasn\u2019t. And I would have to think long and hard about that list because, wow, it\u2019s tiny.\n\nNow it\u2019s certainly true I\u2019ve had many friends over the years both online and offline of various gender expressions who I deeply respect and appreciate. But the trick is, none of these people are in positions of power as you and I would understand it. I still don\u2019t fully grasp the reasons why, but it really does seem that men (white men at least!) are almost universally unable to handle the slightest whiff of unaccountable authority. And the sad truth is, those scenarios are the norm, not the outlier.\n\n\ud83d\udea8 Mediocre white men. \ud83d\udea8\n\nSpare us, please.\n\nI realize, as a white man, I have to put in significant work to recognize when I\u2019m being insensitive, when I\u2019m taking up all the \u201cspace\u201d in a dialogue without realizing it, when I\u2019m expecting people to simply believe my expertise without proving it first. It\u2019s been a process over the years to \u201ccheck my privilege\u201d and I know I\u2019ll keep screwing up from time to time.\n\nWhat truly, utterly enrages me is when the \u201cmanosphere\u201d just comes right out and says Naw, we like our privilege. Fuck you all! It\u2019s the coward\u2019s way out, and the way they think they\u2019re being \u201cmanly\u201d when they act like total assholes makes my stomach churn.\n\nBut equally upsetting is when the performative \u201cgood guys\u201d\u2014the Justin Baldoni\u2019s of the world\u2014get exposed. Alas, this isn\u2019t my first rodeo on that front. I was a huge fan of very Jewish shock comedian Jamie Kilstein a number of years back\u2014he\u2019d already been through a cancellation during a stint as a loud-and-proud liberal, but he\u2019d bounced back to some degree and was trying to portray himself as an open-minded political moderate. (Nowadays I would instantly see that as a red flag, but back then I admired it.) But surprise, surprise\u2014all of a sudden he ended up cozying up to Tim Pool (!!), started hanging out with other alt-right types, and now he\u2019s married and openly a \u201cChristian\u201d (sorry, I don\u2019t buy it for a minute). And this is who he recently interviewed\u2014definitely moderate huh. \ud83d\ude44\n\nSo yeah. Guys getting red-pilled, \u201cfeminists\u201d getting exposed, religious manly men going off the deep end, CEOs becoming drunk with absolute power\u2026it is bleak out there. And as I already wrote about, while I appreciated the \u201ctonic masculinity\u201d of Tim Walz which made a big national splash for a hot minute there, I also didn\u2019t find a whole lot to relate to personally. (I\u2019m not going to restore my prized jalopy any time soon. I guess I must be a communist because I hate cars!)\n\nWhere to Go from Here\u2026\n\nI\u2019m afraid I don\u2019t have many answers right now. I feel like the \u201cbrand\u201d of \u201cbeing a man\u201d has never been more in the toilet\u2014at least here in America. And with the incoming Trump 2.0 administration which is absolutely bone-chilling in too many ways to count, the future of manhood at the national level is dark indeed.\n\nAll I can say is this: I\u2019ll keep speaking out on this topic. I\u2019ll keep writing about masculinity on my blog. I\u2019ll keep thinking about my own gender expression and how that\u2019s evolving. I can tell you right now, 2025 will be a year of experimentation for me. I\u2019m going to slingshot gender conformance right into the heart of the sun. Because if \u201cbeing a man\u201d means being like all of these people who have shown themselves to be truly awful humans, then fuck being a man.\n\nI\u2019ll be something else.\n\n\n\n  \n\n    \n      #gender"
    },
    "name": "How to Be a Real (Good) Man\u2026Epic Fail!",
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43349007",
    "_source": "2783"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-25T17:52:24-08:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2024/12/25/6/power",
    "category": [
        "housefiles",
        "construction"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://aaronparecki.com/img/620x0,q30/2024/12/25/6/photo.jpg"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://bsky.app/profile/aaronpk.com/post/3le6eh6uvb22i",
        "https://micro.blog/aaronpk/53294228"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "We still don't have power from the street yet so in the mean time, I wired an Anker battery into the breaker panel to power all the lights in the house"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aaronparecki.com/images/profile.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "43342236",
    "_source": "16"
}

Tech upgrades

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-25T17:34:36-08:00",
    "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/blog/12688-Tech-upgrades",
    "category": [
        "computers",
        "technology",
        "blogging",
        "Fiona"
    ],
    "name": "Tech upgrades",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "fluffy",
        "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/",
        "photo": "https://beesbuzz.biz/static/headshot.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43341898",
    "_source": "2778"
}

Merry Christmas (in an Irish Castle)!

{
    "type": "entry",
    "author": {
        "name": "Jared White",
        "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/",
        "photo": null
    },
    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/20241225/merry-christmas-in-an-irish-castle",
    "published": "2024-12-25T10:07:02-08:00",
    "content": {
        "html": "<p>I wish you and yours all the best this holiday season. \ud83d\ude0a\ud83c\udf84\ud83c\udf81</p>\n\n<p>And for a little treat: a <strong>blast from the past</strong>! In another life (2001), I performed Celtic music playing the recorder, Irish whistle, and other wind instruments, and our band <strong>Distant Oaks</strong> was privileged to join a host of other musicians and singers to record <em>Christmas in an Irish Castle</em>, produced by <a href=\"https://revels.org/\">Revels</a>.</p>\n\n<p>Here is our rendition of <em>I Saw Three Ships</em>:</p>\n\n<p>Alas, it doesn\u2019t seem like the album is available for online streaming anymore, but you may be able to find a CD used on eBay, Amazon, etc.</p>\n\n<p><img src=\"https://jaredwhite.com/20241225/christmas-in-an-irish-castle.jpg\" alt=\"cover art of Christmas in an Irish Castle\" /></p>\n\n<p>As an alternative play, I can highly recommend my friend and extraordinarily-talented Irish harper Patrick Ball\u2019s album <a href=\"https://music.apple.com/us/album/celtic-harp-the-christmas-rose/201155377\">The Christmas Rose</a>. It\u2019ll get you right in the spirit of Christmas for sure.</p>",
        "text": "I wish you and yours all the best this holiday season. \ud83d\ude0a\ud83c\udf84\ud83c\udf81\n\nAnd for a little treat: a blast from the past! In another life (2001), I performed Celtic music playing the recorder, Irish whistle, and other wind instruments, and our band Distant Oaks was privileged to join a host of other musicians and singers to record Christmas in an Irish Castle, produced by Revels.\n\nHere is our rendition of I Saw Three Ships:\n\nAlas, it doesn\u2019t seem like the album is available for online streaming anymore, but you may be able to find a CD used on eBay, Amazon, etc.\n\n\n\nAs an alternative play, I can highly recommend my friend and extraordinarily-talented Irish harper Patrick Ball\u2019s album The Christmas Rose. It\u2019ll get you right in the spirit of Christmas for sure."
    },
    "name": "Merry Christmas (in an Irish Castle)!",
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43340890",
    "_source": "2783"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-25T06:28:59+00:00",
    "url": "https://cleverdevil.io/2024/-now-i-have-a-whiskey-ho-ho-ho",
    "photo": [
        "https://cleverdevil.io/file/ce3aa4a16394968716eda2251f763059/thumb.jpg"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://cleverdevil.club/@jonathan/113712047393112906",
        "https://bsky.app/profile/cleverdevil.io/post/3le4dgg2fqw2i"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "\u00a0\n\n\u00a0",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://cleverdevil.io/2024/-now-i-have-a-whiskey-ho-ho-ho\"></a>\n            \n                <p>\u00a0</p><p>\u00a0</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Jonathan LaCour",
        "url": "https://cleverdevil.io/profile/cleverdevil",
        "photo": "https://cleverdevil.io/file/e37c3982acf4f0a8421d085b9971cd71/thumb.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "43336429",
    "_source": "10"
}

The original Publ design doc

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-24T19:57:46-08:00",
    "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/blog/6742-The-original-Publ-design-doc",
    "category": [
        "publ",
        "blogging"
    ],
    "name": "The original Publ design doc",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "fluffy",
        "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/",
        "photo": "https://beesbuzz.biz/static/headshot.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43335225",
    "_source": "2778"
}

Brilliant Minds and mirror-touch synaesthesia

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-24T13:09:08-08:00",
    "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/blog/1331-Brilliant-Minds-and-mirror-touch-synaesthesia",
    "category": [
        "TV",
        "Brilliant Minds",
        "neurology"
    ],
    "name": "Brilliant Minds and mirror-touch synaesthesia",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "fluffy",
        "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/",
        "photo": "https://beesbuzz.biz/static/headshot.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "43333411",
    "_source": "2778"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-24 10:40-0800",
    "url": "https://gregorlove.com/2024/12/soon/",
    "content": {
        "text": "Soon. isitchristmas.com",
        "html": "<p>Soon. <a href=\"https://isitchristmas.com/\">isitchristmas.com</a></p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "gRegor Morrill",
        "url": "https://gregorlove.com/",
        "photo": "https://gregorlove.com/site/assets/files/6268/profile-2021-square.300x0.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "43333207",
    "_source": "95"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "author": {
        "name": "Jared White",
        "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/",
        "photo": null
    },
    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/20241223/shrinking-is-just-so-good",
    "published": "2024-12-23T21:06:51-08:00",
    "content": {
        "html": "<p><em>Shrinking</em> is simply one of the best <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/tag/tvshows\">#TVShows</a> on air.</p>\n\n<p>Honestly better than it has any right to be (even though yes, that\u2019s one stacked cast!). Now I realize my emotions are a bit raw at the moment, having come down with a bug (gee, thanks kids!) for the <em>third</em> time in a row before ever getting completely well again. It\u2019s been a fun 6 weeks, that\u2019s for sure! \ud83d\ude44</p>\n\n<p>But even so, watching the penultimate episode of <em>Shrinking</em> Season 2 on Apple TV+ tonight, <strong>I was bawling</strong>. \ud83d\ude2d\ud83d\ude2d Bawling I tell you! I think if someone else had been in the room with me, they would have thought something had gone terribly terribly wrong.</p>\n\n<p>I will admit, I did originally think Season 2 was starting off a bit on the slow side. I was wondering if they\u2019d reach the heights of the <strong>stellar</strong> first season. Well at this point there\u2019s no doubt in my mind. Every episode over the recent stretch has been \u201cOh, you think <em>that</em> was <em>all</em> the feelz? <strong>You ain\u2019t felt nuttin\u2019 yet!</strong>\u201d</p>\n\n<p>Make sure you have ample tissues handy when you watch this show. <strong>Bawling</strong>, I tell you.</p>",
        "text": "Shrinking is simply one of the best #TVShows on air.\n\nHonestly better than it has any right to be (even though yes, that\u2019s one stacked cast!). Now I realize my emotions are a bit raw at the moment, having come down with a bug (gee, thanks kids!) for the third time in a row before ever getting completely well again. It\u2019s been a fun 6 weeks, that\u2019s for sure! \ud83d\ude44\n\nBut even so, watching the penultimate episode of Shrinking Season 2 on Apple TV+ tonight, I was bawling. \ud83d\ude2d\ud83d\ude2d Bawling I tell you! I think if someone else had been in the room with me, they would have thought something had gone terribly terribly wrong.\n\nI will admit, I did originally think Season 2 was starting off a bit on the slow side. I was wondering if they\u2019d reach the heights of the stellar first season. Well at this point there\u2019s no doubt in my mind. Every episode over the recent stretch has been \u201cOh, you think that was all the feelz? You ain\u2019t felt nuttin\u2019 yet!\u201d\n\nMake sure you have ample tissues handy when you watch this show. Bawling, I tell you."
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "43327910",
    "_source": "2783"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-23 12:33-0800",
    "url": "https://gregorlove.com/2024/12/havent-listened-to-much/",
    "category": [
        "music"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Haven\u2019t listened to much holiday music yet, so fixing that with the new Ben Folds, Sleigher. Next up: Scala & Kolacny Brothers, December; and Rosie Thomas, A Very Rosie Christmas. What\u2019s on your list?",
        "html": "<p>Haven\u2019t listened to much holiday music yet, so fixing that with the new Ben Folds, <a href=\"https://album.link/us/i/1766317522\">Sleigher</a>. Next up: Scala &amp; Kolacny Brothers, <a href=\"https://album.link/i/574674425\">December</a>; and Rosie Thomas, <a href=\"https://album.link/i/582745308\">A Very Rosie Christmas</a>. What\u2019s on your list?</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "gRegor Morrill",
        "url": "https://gregorlove.com/",
        "photo": "https://gregorlove.com/site/assets/files/6268/profile-2021-square.300x0.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "43323705",
    "_source": "95"
}

at Fred Meyer

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-23T11:13:50-08:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2024/12/23/5/",
    "photo": [
        "https://aaronparecki.com/img/620x0,q30/2024/12/23/5/photo.jpg"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://www.swarmapp.com/user/59164/checkin/6769b66e493068749d56778b"
    ],
    "name": "at Fred Meyer",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aaronparecki.com/images/profile.jpg"
    },
    "checkin": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Fred Meyer",
        "latitude": "45.533071",
        "longitude": "-122.634948",
        "url": "https://foursquare.com/v/4a8def2af964a520761120e3"
    },
    "post-type": "checkin",
    "_id": "43322536",
    "_source": "16"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2024-12-22T21:01:19-08:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2024/12/22/18/youtube",
    "syndication": [
        "https://bsky.app/profile/aaronpk.com/post/3ldx5lpnivr2w"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "It just occurred to me that YouTube is named after a completely obsolete technology"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aaronparecki.com/images/profile.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "43315776",
    "_source": "16"
}