{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-19T19:11:45-07:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2025/08/19/13/",
    "category": [
        "csa"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/637731d7c29a988f594a613b4ec3e78e817a757a3f3c3faaa8665adc41091ee8.jpg"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "This week's CSA"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/41061f9de825966faa22e9c42830e1d4a614a321213b4575b9488aa93f89817a.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45752201",
    "_source": "16"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-24T22:15:05-07:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2025/08/24/17/",
    "category": [
        "cooking",
        "csa"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/ab6e5842e90ab41cae25bd6781983b91c6ac7957d3d3a38f8569cf68a4cb5285.jpg",
        "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/f3f752bb7b51e272becee150a5c63267c7e89c06d1e6172f3654f29b396450e1.jpg"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "At the end of the week, I take all the CSA veggies left and turn them into a giant soup and freeze it. This will pay off in the winter!"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/41061f9de825966faa22e9c42830e1d4a614a321213b4575b9488aa93f89817a.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45752187",
    "_source": "16"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-24T12:01:23-07:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2025/08/24/8/",
    "category": [
        "https://foursquare.com/user/1502"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/319abec70d6956ff5770d568165d03e1ced2a9fe463404d925baa04556cab7c1.jpg"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://www.swarmapp.com/user/59164/checkin/68ab6183c5901d544837932a"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Firing up the slushie machine \u2014 with Mike",
        "html": "Firing up the slushie machine \u2014 with <a href=\"https://foursquare.com/user/1502\">Mike</a>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/41061f9de825966faa22e9c42830e1d4a614a321213b4575b9488aa93f89817a.jpg"
    },
    "checkin": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Ladd Circle Park",
        "latitude": "45.508518",
        "longitude": "-122.649439",
        "url": "https://foursquare.com/v/4b8d9a27f964a5209d0333e3"
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    "post-type": "checkin",
    "_id": "45749601",
    "_source": "16"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-24T10:13:47-0400",
    "url": "https://martymcgui.re/2025/08/24/101347/",
    "category": [
        "game-a-day",
        "ACNL"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://res.cloudinary.com/schmarty/image/fetch/w_960,c_fill/https://media.martymcgui.re/10/39/8a/a2/3554c5e96e2f29465d92e69aa683a724b6677d43210057d996076228.JPG"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Show me a creature who does not enjoy a breath of fresh air, and I will show you a stinky fish, yes?",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://media.martymcgui.re/10/39/8a/a2/3554c5e96e2f29465d92e69aa683a724b6677d43210057d996076228.JPG\"></a>\n\n  <p>Show me a creature who does not enjoy a breath of fresh air, and I will show you a stinky fish, yes?</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Marty McGuire",
        "url": "https://martymcgui.re/",
        "photo": "https://martymcgui.re/images/logo.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45748861",
    "_source": "175"
}

Link: “The Mule” is a Villain for the Ages

{
    "type": "entry",
    "author": {
        "name": "Jared White",
        "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/",
        "photo": null
    },
    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/links/20250822/the-mule-is-a-villain-for-the-ages",
    "published": "2025-08-22T22:01:51-07:00",
    "content": {
        "html": "<blockquote>\n  <h2><a href=\"https://www.inverse.com/entertainment/the-mule-foundation-season-3-episode-7-pilou-asbaek\"></a></h2>\n\n  <p>The Apple TV+ version of Foundation, Season 3, has finally revealed the Mule, as played by Pilou Asb\u00e6k.</p>\n\n<p>\u201cHe\u2019s probably one of the best-written villains if you ask me,\u201d Asb\u00e6k tells Inverse. \u201cHe\u2019s right up there next to Voldemort.\u201d But, with Season 3, specifically, Episode 7, Foundation is twisting the Asimovian origin of the Mule. Or is it?</p>\n\n</blockquote>\n\n<p>I never read the <em>Foundation</em> books by Issac Asimov, but ahead of season 3 of the Apple TV+ show I\u2019d been hearing all the chatter about bringing one of the book series\u2019 big bads to life: <strong>The Mule</strong>.</p>\n\n<p>I\u2019ll admit I was rather nervous; something I\u2019ve loved throughout my watch of <em>Foundation</em> is that many of the \u201cbad guys\u201d are complex and nuanced, and you don\u2019t necessarily appreciate everything the \u201cgood guys\u201d are up to either. There\u2019s a lot of gray area. Now suddenly I\u2019m expected to believe some heinous madman will come waltzing into the picture, bending everyone\u2019s minds to his evil will while unraveling <em>psychohistory</em> in the process? Sounded all a bit silly\u2026infantile even.</p>\n\n<p><strong>I needn\u2019t have worried.</strong></p>\n\n<p>Pilou Asb\u00e6k is <strong>crushing it</strong> in this role. He\u2019s a scenery-chewing bad dude who doesn\u2019t steal the show due to eloquent monologues or brooding underhanded villainy like we often see in these sorts of roles. Rather, he overtly perpetrates despicable violence\u2014at times truly grotesque\u2014as he gleefully guffaws at the supposed frivolity of it all. He\u2019s quite clever <em>and</em> completely unhinged, and I can\u2019t recall seeing a character quite like this since that most excellent villain of <em>Jessica Jones</em> season 1, the Purple Man (Zebediah Killgrave, played to perfection by David Tennant).</p>\n\n<p>Season 3 of <em>Foundation</em> thus far is every bit as good as the first two, which results in this continuing to be one of the greatest <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/tag/scifi\">#scifi</a> <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/tag/tvshows\">#tvshows</a> of all time in my estimation. <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/articles/my-top-5-scifi-tv-shows-of-2023#1-foundation-season-2\">Season 2 catapulted Foundation to my top show of 2023</a> and I wrote at the time:</p>\n\n<blockquote>\n  <p>I was riveted every moment\u2014and I can\u2019t wait to rewatch this show again and again. Might we dare to hope that season 3 will be as good as the first two? <strong>I do! Bring it on.</strong></p>\n</blockquote>\n\n<p>And so they are.</p>",
        "text": "The Apple TV+ version of Foundation, Season 3, has finally revealed the Mule, as played by Pilou Asb\u00e6k.\n\n\u201cHe\u2019s probably one of the best-written villains if you ask me,\u201d Asb\u00e6k tells Inverse. \u201cHe\u2019s right up there next to Voldemort.\u201d But, with Season 3, specifically, Episode 7, Foundation is twisting the Asimovian origin of the Mule. Or is it?\n\n\n\nI never read the Foundation books by Issac Asimov, but ahead of season 3 of the Apple TV+ show I\u2019d been hearing all the chatter about bringing one of the book series\u2019 big bads to life: The Mule.\n\nI\u2019ll admit I was rather nervous; something I\u2019ve loved throughout my watch of Foundation is that many of the \u201cbad guys\u201d are complex and nuanced, and you don\u2019t necessarily appreciate everything the \u201cgood guys\u201d are up to either. There\u2019s a lot of gray area. Now suddenly I\u2019m expected to believe some heinous madman will come waltzing into the picture, bending everyone\u2019s minds to his evil will while unraveling psychohistory in the process? Sounded all a bit silly\u2026infantile even.\n\nI needn\u2019t have worried.\n\nPilou Asb\u00e6k is crushing it in this role. He\u2019s a scenery-chewing bad dude who doesn\u2019t steal the show due to eloquent monologues or brooding underhanded villainy like we often see in these sorts of roles. Rather, he overtly perpetrates despicable violence\u2014at times truly grotesque\u2014as he gleefully guffaws at the supposed frivolity of it all. He\u2019s quite clever and completely unhinged, and I can\u2019t recall seeing a character quite like this since that most excellent villain of Jessica Jones season 1, the Purple Man (Zebediah Killgrave, played to perfection by David Tennant).\n\nSeason 3 of Foundation thus far is every bit as good as the first two, which results in this continuing to be one of the greatest #scifi #tvshows of all time in my estimation. Season 2 catapulted Foundation to my top show of 2023 and I wrote at the time:\n\n\n  I was riveted every moment\u2014and I can\u2019t wait to rewatch this show again and again. Might we dare to hope that season 3 will be as good as the first two? I do! Bring it on.\n\n\nAnd so they are."
    },
    "name": "Link: \u201cThe Mule\u201d is a Villain for the Ages",
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "45740214",
    "_source": "2783"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-23T02:45:20+00:00",
    "url": "https://cleverdevil.io/2025/birdhouse-20-is-coming-along-nicely",
    "photo": [
        "https://cleverdevil.io/file/940891e19fa42690e12a7249dd2fe357/thumb.png"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://cleverdevil.club/@jonathan/115075784442145827",
        "https://bsky.app/profile/cleverdevil.io/post/3lwzxca2pq426"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "This one is designed to last!\n\n\u00a0",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://cleverdevil.io/2025/birdhouse-20-is-coming-along-nicely\"></a>\n            \n                <p>This one is designed to last!</p><p>\u00a0</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Jonathan LaCour",
        "url": "https://cleverdevil.io/profile/cleverdevil",
        "photo": "https://cleverdevil.io/file/e37c3982acf4f0a8421d085b9971cd71/thumb.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45739177",
    "_source": "10"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-22T21:22:31-0400",
    "url": "https://martymcgui.re/2025/08/22/212231/",
    "category": [
        "game-a-day",
        "ACNL"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://res.cloudinary.com/schmarty/image/fetch/w_960,c_fill/https://media.martymcgui.re/fa/98/d5/80/7f3c59aabfe632eaa6de7a6beb71d20bd7b3777c00dc095c1446743c.JPG"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Now is Pav\u00e9\u2019s personal time. Please! No autographs. \u2026Forgive Pav\u00e9. He is tired.",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://media.martymcgui.re/fa/98/d5/80/7f3c59aabfe632eaa6de7a6beb71d20bd7b3777c00dc095c1446743c.JPG\"></a>\n\n  <p>Now is Pav\u00e9\u2019s personal time. Please! No autographs. \u2026Forgive Pav\u00e9. He is tired.</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Marty McGuire",
        "url": "https://martymcgui.re/",
        "photo": "https://martymcgui.re/images/logo.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45738886",
    "_source": "175"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-22 11:20-0700",
    "url": "https://gregorlove.com/2025/08/i-was-reminded-that/",
    "category": [
        "music",
        "CovidConscious"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://bsky.app/profile/gregorlove.com/post/3lwz3pyo3ks2j"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Purity Ring is requesting that fans wear high-quality masks at their shows and they\u2019re providing them if you need one. Grabbed a ticket so fast!\n\n\n\u201cwe kindly request that fans please wear high filtration masks at our shows. n95 or kn95, and we'll have them at the door if anyone needs. thank you!!!\u201d\nhttps://www.instagram.com/p/DL7zqJnRu-m/",
        "html": "<p><a href=\"https://purityringthing.com/\">Purity Ring</a> is requesting that fans wear high-quality masks at their shows <b>and</b> they\u2019re providing them if you need one. Grabbed a ticket so fast!</p>\n\n<blockquote>\n<p>\u201cwe kindly request that fans please wear high filtration masks at our shows. n95 or kn95, and we'll have them at the door if anyone needs. thank you!!!\u201d</p>\n<a href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/DL7zqJnRu-m/\">https://www.instagram.com/p/DL7zqJnRu-m/</a>\n</blockquote>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "gRegor Morrill",
        "url": "https://gregorlove.com/",
        "photo": "https://gregorlove.com/site/assets/files/6268/profile-2021-square.300x0.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "45736853",
    "_source": "95"
}

On the quest for VR hand tracking

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-22T03:18:39-07:00",
    "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/blog/7168-On-the-quest-for-VR-hand-tracking",
    "category": [
        "VR",
        "VRChat",
        "throw money at it"
    ],
    "name": "On the quest for VR hand tracking",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "fluffy",
        "url": "https://beesbuzz.biz/",
        "photo": "https://beesbuzz.biz/static/headshot.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "article",
    "_id": "45732048",
    "_source": "2778"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-21T20:12:40-0400",
    "url": "https://martymcgui.re/2025/08/21/201240/",
    "category": [
        "game-a-day",
        "ACNL"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://res.cloudinary.com/schmarty/image/fetch/w_960,c_fill/https://media.martymcgui.re/be/c8/ed/52/222a06ce8bd16e63bfec21fde851a5d9bab545459d7af168945d6958.JPG"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "For some reason, there\u2019s a new \u201csuddenly trip and fall down\u201d mechanic in Animal Crossing New Leaf tonight.",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://media.martymcgui.re/be/c8/ed/52/222a06ce8bd16e63bfec21fde851a5d9bab545459d7af168945d6958.JPG\"></a>\n\n  <p>For some reason, there\u2019s a new \u201csuddenly trip and fall down\u201d mechanic in Animal Crossing New Leaf tonight.</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Marty McGuire",
        "url": "https://martymcgui.re/",
        "photo": "https://martymcgui.re/images/logo.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45730065",
    "_source": "175"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "author": {
        "name": "Jared White",
        "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/",
        "photo": null
    },
    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/20250821/feeling-strangely-optimistic",
    "published": "2025-08-21T17:41:57-07:00",
    "content": {
        "html": "<p>Current mood: <strong>strangely optimistic!</strong></p>\n\n<p>I know if you turn on the news, you can point to a wide variety of individual scenarios which seem to indicate that we are all completely and totally fucked.</p>\n\n<p>And yet\u2026I feel like we\u2019re right at that point in the movie when the tide seems to be turning; that elusive tipping point where the good folk seem to be winning.</p>\n\n<p>From slop-infested Big Tech shenanigans to the gross project of converting America into a fascist oligarchy, <strong>the people are rising up.</strong> Our freedoms and our values aren\u2019t going to be eradicated without a fight. And I\u2019m feeling good about where we\u2019re at in that fight.</p>\n\n<p>I won\u2019t go all Pollyanna on you and say it\u2019s time to relax and stop worrying. Far from it! But I\u2019m far more pumped today about the future than I was six months ago. \ud83d\udcaa <strong>We got this.</strong> \u270a</p>",
        "text": "Current mood: strangely optimistic!\n\nI know if you turn on the news, you can point to a wide variety of individual scenarios which seem to indicate that we are all completely and totally fucked.\n\nAnd yet\u2026I feel like we\u2019re right at that point in the movie when the tide seems to be turning; that elusive tipping point where the good folk seem to be winning.\n\nFrom slop-infested Big Tech shenanigans to the gross project of converting America into a fascist oligarchy, the people are rising up. Our freedoms and our values aren\u2019t going to be eradicated without a fight. And I\u2019m feeling good about where we\u2019re at in that fight.\n\nI won\u2019t go all Pollyanna on you and say it\u2019s time to relax and stop worrying. Far from it! But I\u2019m far more pumped today about the future than I was six months ago. \ud83d\udcaa We got this. \u270a"
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "45730042",
    "_source": "2783"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-21T12:48:17-07:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2025/08/21/6/",
    "category": [
        "cooking"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/9a78499b7d2cd524a88ed49bfb54963f389389075dc0de13486145cd010e4c39.jpg"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "If I'm going to run the dehydrator all day, might as well fill it up!"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/41061f9de825966faa22e9c42830e1d4a614a321213b4575b9488aa93f89817a.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45727100",
    "_source": "16"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-20T20:30:59-0400",
    "url": "https://martymcgui.re/2025/08/20/203059/",
    "category": [
        "game-a-day",
        "ACNL"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://res.cloudinary.com/schmarty/image/fetch/w_960,c_fill/https://media.martymcgui.re/85/37/1c/55/f80cb2dc9153f0765161b5a4ac0199269345a0ee489716d704bb1f53.JPG"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "I\u2019m probably more comfortable with turnips than I am with people!",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://media.martymcgui.re/85/37/1c/55/f80cb2dc9153f0765161b5a4ac0199269345a0ee489716d704bb1f53.JPG\"></a>\n\n  <p>I\u2019m probably more comfortable with turnips than I am with people!</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Marty McGuire",
        "url": "https://martymcgui.re/",
        "photo": "https://martymcgui.re/images/logo.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45720822",
    "_source": "175"
}

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-20 18:08-0700",
    "url": "https://gregorlove.com/2025/08/spent-most-of-the/",
    "category": [
        "gripes",
        "WorstPress"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://bsky.app/profile/gregorlove.com/post/3lwur3smgt422"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Spent most of the day cleaning up a hacked website. Computers might have been a mistake. WordPress definitely was.",
        "html": "<p>Spent most of the day cleaning up a hacked website. Computers might have been a mistake. WordPress definitely was.</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "gRegor Morrill",
        "url": "https://gregorlove.com/",
        "photo": "https://gregorlove.com/site/assets/files/6268/profile-2021-square.300x0.jpg"
    },
    "post-type": "note",
    "_id": "45720459",
    "_source": "95"
}

at Front Deck

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-20T19:42:15-07:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2025/08/20/13/",
    "photo": [
        "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/1f986d5873cdc50218f25d301444a13718f8e142cf1be61d7b1fec657c1504c8.jpg"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://www.swarmapp.com/user/59164/checkin/68a687873035e87ff0da6453"
    ],
    "name": "at Front Deck",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/41061f9de825966faa22e9c42830e1d4a614a321213b4575b9488aa93f89817a.jpg"
    },
    "checkin": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Front Deck",
        "latitude": "45.540405",
        "longitude": "-122.688844",
        "url": "https://foursquare.com/v/4ef2eac5b8f7f381f779701a"
    },
    "post-type": "checkin",
    "_id": "45720375",
    "_source": "16"
}

at Riverscape

{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-20T19:41:45-07:00",
    "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/2025/08/20/12/",
    "photo": [
        "https://aaronparecki.com/img/620x0,q30/2025/08/20/12/photo.jpg"
    ],
    "syndication": [
        "https://www.swarmapp.com/user/59164/checkin/68a68769aa7395580bd6debf"
    ],
    "name": "at Riverscape",
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Aaron Parecki",
        "url": "https://aaronparecki.com/",
        "photo": "https://aperture-media.p3k.io/aaronparecki.com/41061f9de825966faa22e9c42830e1d4a614a321213b4575b9488aa93f89817a.jpg"
    },
    "checkin": {
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        "name": "Riverscape",
        "latitude": "45.539226",
        "longitude": "-122.689225",
        "url": "https://foursquare.com/v/4c5cd0a3857ca593e25fcbcb"
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    "post-type": "checkin",
    "_id": "45720376",
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{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-19T21:58:44-0400",
    "url": "https://martymcgui.re/2025/08/19/215844/",
    "category": [
        "game-a-day",
        "ACNL"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://res.cloudinary.com/schmarty/image/fetch/w_960,c_fill/https://media.martymcgui.re/a5/5d/24/0a/9931b157de35b5f6790dbcadae9d7fdabe9362011ab2904fbec645bb.JPG"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Look, the sleigh is great, but it doesn\u2019t exactly run on unleaded. This is my daily driver!",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://media.martymcgui.re/a5/5d/24/0a/9931b157de35b5f6790dbcadae9d7fdabe9362011ab2904fbec645bb.JPG\"></a>\n\n  <p>Look, the sleigh is great, but it doesn\u2019t exactly run on unleaded. This is my daily driver!</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Marty McGuire",
        "url": "https://martymcgui.re/",
        "photo": "https://martymcgui.re/images/logo.jpg"
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{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-18T22:45:29-0400",
    "url": "https://martymcgui.re/2025/08/18/224529/",
    "category": [
        "game-a-day",
        "ACNL"
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    "photo": [
        "https://res.cloudinary.com/schmarty/image/fetch/w_960,c_fill/https://media.martymcgui.re/54/b8/44/82/2d2880c92af364a9547706aa60367b27eb70fffe6bf7b133ea452f4c.JPG"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "Does my hair look all right, maaan? I like to look good when I fly my freak flag, you know?",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://media.martymcgui.re/54/b8/44/82/2d2880c92af364a9547706aa60367b27eb70fffe6bf7b133ea452f4c.JPG\"></a>\n\n  <p>Does my hair look all right, maaan? I like to look good when I fly my freak flag, you know?</p>"
    },
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        "type": "card",
        "name": "Marty McGuire",
        "url": "https://martymcgui.re/",
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Link: What a Reality TV Queer Dating Show Reminded Me About Healing from Life with a Narcissist

{
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        "name": "Jared White",
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    "url": "https://jaredwhite.com/links/20250817/the-ultimatum-queer-love",
    "published": "2025-08-17T22:35:15-07:00",
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        "html": "<blockquote>\n  <h2><a href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvQn1wNdzXU\"></a></h2>\n\n  <p>Post Reunion of Ultimatum Queer Love with Tiff Der (YouTube)<br />\u201cI never had my side of the story during the reunion. After consistent allegations post reunion, I am now here to stand up for myself and plenty of other survivors.\u201c</p>\n\n</blockquote>\n\n<p>This might just be one of the least relevant links I\u2019ve ever posted\u2026that is, least relevant to subjects I normally talk about. Reality TV dating shows? On-camera relationship drama? \ud83d\ude02</p>\n\n<p>And yet\u2026I got <em>completely sucked into</em> a show on Netflix called <em>The Ultimatum: Queer Love</em> at the impassioned behest of my teenager. I missed the beginnings of Season 1 but picked it up a few episodes in and finished watching that season with my kid. The basic premise of <em>The Ultimatum</em> is that one person in a relationship wants to get married and perhaps start a <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/tag/family\">#family</a>, and the other person has been dragging their feet. So the person who desires marriage gives an \u201cultimatum\u201d\u2014aka if you\u2019re not willing to marry me, I\u2019m ready to leave the relationship. The twist of the show is that everyone spends a few weeks \u201cdating\u201d someone else on the show who is not their original partner, living with them in a \u201ctrial marriage\u201d. Then everyone swaps back to their original partner and lives in another trial marriage. Then the moment of truth arrives: will the original couple get engaged after everything that has happened? Or will they break up for good?!</p>\n\n<p>Yeah, it\u2019s weird and goofy. But that\u2019s reality <a href=\"https://jaredwhite.com/tag/tvshows\">#TVshows</a> for ya!</p>\n\n<p><em>But here\u2019s where it gets\u2026troubling.</em></p>\n\n<p><strong>Trigger warning: this discussion is about narcissistic behavior, DV, and emotional abuse. Please tread with care.</strong></p>\n\n<p>So I was enjoying the show and getting pretty invested in the people, certainly unusual for me as an intentional avoider of reality TV. We were enjoying our time together watching it\u2026and then we got to the final episode which was a reunion of all the people who had been part of the experience, shot almost a year later. It\u2019s a \u201cwhere are they now?\u201d checkin.</p>\n\n<p>One of the couples, Tiff &amp; Mildred, had had a very tumultuous time on the show, both with each other and also with the other trial partners. But at the conclusion of the experience,</p>\n\n<p>\ud83d\udea8 <em>Spoiler Alert!</em> \ud83d\udea8</p>\n\n<p>Tiff &amp; Mildred had gotten engaged. Yay! <strong>We were all happy for the couple.</strong></p>\n\n<p>BUT\u2026</p>\n\n<p>The reunion came, and when it was Tiff\u2019s turn to start sharing what had happened in that year since the experience, they barely got the chance to blurt out a few sentences about how their dog had to go to the hospital before Mildred just started laying into them. And I mean absolutely <em>hurling</em> accusations Tiff\u2019s way. It got extremely heated, and not in the sort of passive-aggressive reality TV drama sort of way I\u2019m used to seeing. This was something else. This was fire hot. There was talk of infidelity, abuse, Tiff calling the police on Mildred, financial chicanery, and just a lot.</p>\n\n<p>It got so bad Tiff literally stood up and walked off the set in tears. They had a kind of meltdown outside, and it was truly concerning. The producers attempted to help them at least get back inside the building, perhaps not back on the set, but Tiff ended up just getting into a car and driving off. That was the last we saw of them on that final reunion episode.</p>\n\n<p><strong>I was agog and aghast.</strong></p>\n\n<p>This felt really, really bad. I couldn\u2019t understand how the producers of the show allowed that explosive fight to happen in the first place. <em>I don\u2019t think it should have aired.</em> These are real people\u2019s lives we\u2019re talking about. It\u2019s not just another bout of entertainment.</p>\n\n<p>I was so genuinely concerned for Tiff\u2019s wellbeing, I started searching the web for any followup on what had happened and if they were OK. Thankfully they are, and in the video linked to above Tiff shares their side of the story before and after the reunion. Now I will admit I haven\u2019t sought out any of Mildred\u2019s statements or rebuttals. Because, honestly, I\u2019m not here to take sides as some sort of armchair critic.</p>\n\n<p>I\u2019m simply here to say: <strong>I understand EVERYTHING Tiff is saying about that situation.</strong> Having once been in a long-term relationship with a narcissist, it really caught me off-guard to see just how similar the personality traits and backstory were in this situation. I have been a victim of DARVO on numerous occasions. I know <em>exactly</em> what it\u2019s like to be repeatedly gaslit. I can point to the place in my body where I <em>feel</em> it, it\u2019s has been so palpable for me. Thankfully I\u2019ve gone through a tremendous amount of healing, yet I can still <em>physically place</em> within my torso where everything tightens into knots recalling how I was victimized by narcissistic abuse.</p>\n\n<p>Again, I don\u2019t know these people and I\u2019m not going out of my way to \u201cpick sides\u201d on a reality TV dating show. All I\u2019m saying is <strong>I wasn\u2019t prepared for this show to bring this all up for me again!</strong> I\u2019m speaking out because I\u2019m glad Tiff was able to speak out. I don\u2019t like how the production handled the reunion or Tiff\u2019s story. At all. But a lot of people have seen their video here on YouTube after the fact, and I\u2019m glad they got the opportunity to speak their truth.</p>\n\n<p>There will come a time\u2014in the somewhat distant future to be quite honest with you because I want to protect my children\u2019s privacy\u2014when I will feel at liberty to speak my truth. For now, I\u2019m just thankful I have had a lot of opportunity this year to continue to heal and to realize, like Tiff says, that <strong>I am enough.</strong> I am a good person. And I deserve to be with someone who always seeks the good in me and is forgiving of my flaws. And I hope to extend that very same grace to a future partner as well.</p>",
        "text": "Post Reunion of Ultimatum Queer Love with Tiff Der (YouTube)\n\u201cI never had my side of the story during the reunion. After consistent allegations post reunion, I am now here to stand up for myself and plenty of other survivors.\u201c\n\n\n\nThis might just be one of the least relevant links I\u2019ve ever posted\u2026that is, least relevant to subjects I normally talk about. Reality TV dating shows? On-camera relationship drama? \ud83d\ude02\n\nAnd yet\u2026I got completely sucked into a show on Netflix called The Ultimatum: Queer Love at the impassioned behest of my teenager. I missed the beginnings of Season 1 but picked it up a few episodes in and finished watching that season with my kid. The basic premise of The Ultimatum is that one person in a relationship wants to get married and perhaps start a #family, and the other person has been dragging their feet. So the person who desires marriage gives an \u201cultimatum\u201d\u2014aka if you\u2019re not willing to marry me, I\u2019m ready to leave the relationship. The twist of the show is that everyone spends a few weeks \u201cdating\u201d someone else on the show who is not their original partner, living with them in a \u201ctrial marriage\u201d. Then everyone swaps back to their original partner and lives in another trial marriage. Then the moment of truth arrives: will the original couple get engaged after everything that has happened? Or will they break up for good?!\n\nYeah, it\u2019s weird and goofy. But that\u2019s reality #TVshows for ya!\n\nBut here\u2019s where it gets\u2026troubling.\n\nTrigger warning: this discussion is about narcissistic behavior, DV, and emotional abuse. Please tread with care.\n\nSo I was enjoying the show and getting pretty invested in the people, certainly unusual for me as an intentional avoider of reality TV. We were enjoying our time together watching it\u2026and then we got to the final episode which was a reunion of all the people who had been part of the experience, shot almost a year later. It\u2019s a \u201cwhere are they now?\u201d checkin.\n\nOne of the couples, Tiff & Mildred, had had a very tumultuous time on the show, both with each other and also with the other trial partners. But at the conclusion of the experience,\n\n\ud83d\udea8 Spoiler Alert! \ud83d\udea8\n\nTiff & Mildred had gotten engaged. Yay! We were all happy for the couple.\n\nBUT\u2026\n\nThe reunion came, and when it was Tiff\u2019s turn to start sharing what had happened in that year since the experience, they barely got the chance to blurt out a few sentences about how their dog had to go to the hospital before Mildred just started laying into them. And I mean absolutely hurling accusations Tiff\u2019s way. It got extremely heated, and not in the sort of passive-aggressive reality TV drama sort of way I\u2019m used to seeing. This was something else. This was fire hot. There was talk of infidelity, abuse, Tiff calling the police on Mildred, financial chicanery, and just a lot.\n\nIt got so bad Tiff literally stood up and walked off the set in tears. They had a kind of meltdown outside, and it was truly concerning. The producers attempted to help them at least get back inside the building, perhaps not back on the set, but Tiff ended up just getting into a car and driving off. That was the last we saw of them on that final reunion episode.\n\nI was agog and aghast.\n\nThis felt really, really bad. I couldn\u2019t understand how the producers of the show allowed that explosive fight to happen in the first place. I don\u2019t think it should have aired. These are real people\u2019s lives we\u2019re talking about. It\u2019s not just another bout of entertainment.\n\nI was so genuinely concerned for Tiff\u2019s wellbeing, I started searching the web for any followup on what had happened and if they were OK. Thankfully they are, and in the video linked to above Tiff shares their side of the story before and after the reunion. Now I will admit I haven\u2019t sought out any of Mildred\u2019s statements or rebuttals. Because, honestly, I\u2019m not here to take sides as some sort of armchair critic.\n\nI\u2019m simply here to say: I understand EVERYTHING Tiff is saying about that situation. Having once been in a long-term relationship with a narcissist, it really caught me off-guard to see just how similar the personality traits and backstory were in this situation. I have been a victim of DARVO on numerous occasions. I know exactly what it\u2019s like to be repeatedly gaslit. I can point to the place in my body where I feel it, it\u2019s has been so palpable for me. Thankfully I\u2019ve gone through a tremendous amount of healing, yet I can still physically place within my torso where everything tightens into knots recalling how I was victimized by narcissistic abuse.\n\nAgain, I don\u2019t know these people and I\u2019m not going out of my way to \u201cpick sides\u201d on a reality TV dating show. All I\u2019m saying is I wasn\u2019t prepared for this show to bring this all up for me again! I\u2019m speaking out because I\u2019m glad Tiff was able to speak out. I don\u2019t like how the production handled the reunion or Tiff\u2019s story. At all. But a lot of people have seen their video here on YouTube after the fact, and I\u2019m glad they got the opportunity to speak their truth.\n\nThere will come a time\u2014in the somewhat distant future to be quite honest with you because I want to protect my children\u2019s privacy\u2014when I will feel at liberty to speak my truth. For now, I\u2019m just thankful I have had a lot of opportunity this year to continue to heal and to realize, like Tiff says, that I am enough. I am a good person. And I deserve to be with someone who always seeks the good in me and is forgiving of my flaws. And I hope to extend that very same grace to a future partner as well."
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{
    "type": "entry",
    "published": "2025-08-17T23:09:42-0400",
    "url": "https://martymcgui.re/2025/08/17/230942/",
    "category": [
        "game-a-day",
        "ACNL"
    ],
    "photo": [
        "https://res.cloudinary.com/schmarty/image/fetch/w_960,c_fill/https://media.martymcgui.re/4d/07/4c/9d/26bf4de27307d40b9fec08addb3d3b6c85956aa18f0aa0958e0d950f.JPG"
    ],
    "content": {
        "text": "There\u2019s still plenty more to come, so please enjoy them until your body just can\u2019t stand the fun!",
        "html": "<a href=\"https://media.martymcgui.re/4d/07/4c/9d/26bf4de27307d40b9fec08addb3d3b6c85956aa18f0aa0958e0d950f.JPG\"></a>\n\n  <p>There\u2019s still plenty more to come, so please enjoy them until your body just can\u2019t stand the fun!</p>"
    },
    "author": {
        "type": "card",
        "name": "Marty McGuire",
        "url": "https://martymcgui.re/",
        "photo": "https://martymcgui.re/images/logo.jpg"
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    "post-type": "photo",
    "_id": "45692897",
    "_source": "175"
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